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Freaky Friday: Post Break-Up Rules

How To Move On & Come Out Better Than Before

Freaky Friday: Every Friday a new post dealing with love, relationships, dating...and anything else the human soul may need answered. 

Post Break-Up Rules

I’ve become a professional when it comes to the post break-up life.  I see the break-up as an opportunity, not a loss.  Yes, something has ended…Maybe even wonderful and that in itself is sad.  Sit with the break-up, don’t wallow in it.  Reflect but don’t obsess.  Be present, acknowledge the feelings and the relationship but don’t cast aside what your present and future life could be. 

Here is what I have learned from break-ups first hand on every scenario out there;  where someone has cheated on the other…Or no one is to blame, you’ve just drifted apart…someone doesn’t care for the other quite the way they used to…or maybe the worst result of a union; when they are an amazing person and you love them but you don’t want to be with them for no particular reason. 

 

-Stop the Talk: No more talking, texting or emailing with your ex unless you couldn't care less about them.  In short, you could see them with someone else and be happy for them. 

-Work Out: Being active helps the mind to deal with stress and release endorphins, making you a happier person. 

-Talk to Friends:  The more you talk about something the less special it becomes.  Statistics show that because women talk about their break ups more than men, women tend to move on faster from a past relationship than men do.

-Cleanse: Get rid of their things and anything that reminds you of your ex. Example: All their shirts that are still hanging in the closet.

-Do Whatever Your Ex Didn't Like You Doing: Did your ex yell at you for eating in bed?  Well, guess who isn't there anymore?  Them!  It's time to do all the little things that used to annoy your ex or whatever they didn't like to do with you.  They had no interest in guns…clean your 9mm and head out to the gun range!

-Give Yourself Time: Be by yourself before jumping into a new relationship.  Depending on how long the last relationship was; A nice rule of thumb for every week you were together is a day to yourself. Example: If you were together for a year, wait 48 days before jumping back in the ring. Use this time to build yourself back up. Someone asks you out in the meantime say “I’m not able to but could we in a few weeks?”

-Take a Trip:  Doesn't matter where you are headed; just pack a bag and go.  Seriously, travel raises your vibration, opens your mind and gives you some much needed distance from the other person.

-Take Up a New Hobby: Have you always wanted to learn how to surf? There’s no time like the present!  Grow a pair and explore the unknown and venture out of your comfort zone.

-Make a List: What do you want in your next relationship as well as in your next partner? This is my favorite.  I like to write down what I want.  It's important to be realistic.  Example: If you want someone tall, don't write down 6'2", write down tall enough for me to wear heals and to feel like a woman.  If you write down 6'2" you could be missing out on the amazing person that isn't nessisarily what you had in mind.  Another example: You would like to be in a relationship where you live in a permanent state of courtship, doing the little things and taking care of each other.  You feel so good just being around them.  Cater this list to your own needs and wants.

-Learn and Heal: We can all get ourselves into a dating pattern. Sometimes our pattern is the reason why our relationships are not working out. Figure out what went wrong and what you would do differently.  Work on what you need to work on, so you don't make the same mistake again.  Example: I'm a passionate person and with great passion sometimes come a heated fuse.  What I have learned from my past relationships and one reason things went wrong was because I reacted to a situation instead of taking a step back.  Now, I am always working on not jumping to conclusions and having more patience.  I make a conscience effort to go with the flow and be mindful.

Remember, the best revenge is to have the time of your life and to be happy.  It's time to open new doors for you.  Enjoy Life!

~Stay Well~